Day 366: A look from the outside-in

Photographer|Mom|Ally-Awesome

I knew she could shoot. Her photo essays and creative portraitures blew me away the first time I saw them.


But Lyndsay Doyle is so much more.


The universe, it does work in mysterious ways,

and sometimes we're just destined to meet someone.

Someone who will go out of their way to see us and help us be seen.


Thanks Lyndsay for being apart of our journey. One that we're quietly sharing. Slowly.

Thanks for your powerful words, citizenship and kindness; and for seeing us.


Allyship in action. Written by Lyndsay Doyle and shared on Sept. 19, 2018

https://www.facebook.com/LyndsayDoylePhotography/


Photo: Lyndsay Doyle Photography

"I am a boy, Mum. I know it and I don't know what to do. I was born in the wrong body. Please Mum...please.

You HAVE to believe me...I don't know what to do."


*********


We sat and drank coffee for two hours. She told me their story. She talked, I listened. I had shot pictures for their family previously, but outside of that hour we spent together a couple of years prior, we were essentially strangers. And for some reason, she chose me. I kept listening…


Their story was just over a year old. Layers and layers of complexity. Obstacles, setbacks, tears, trust, love. Lives changed and friendships broken. Fight, fall down, get up and fight again. Exhausted.


A child born in the wrong body. A CHILD. I have children. You have children.

It hit me hard.


Transgender.


A child.


Their baby.


She told me stories. Some happy, some sad. Some that I still can’t quite wrap my head around. My naivete shone brightly as I listened to stories of exclusion, ignorance, and even violence. Surely not in my neighbourhood. Not my generation. Not against a child.


A child.


Parents… is this is our fault? I’m inclined to think it is. I want to think we are better than this, but I’m not entirely convinced.


Do you know what I saw when I went to shoot this family? I saw a regular family, in a regular house, with a regular dog. I saw siblings doing sibling things. I saw unity. I saw strength, and love. I saw a happy, confident child that is clearly, CLEARLY now comfortable in his skin.


But, do you know what else I saw?

Exhaustion, thinking about the life-long uphill battle for fairness that’s in front of them. Defeat, knowing that most application forms only have two boxes – male or female. Disappointment in knowing that certain countries are no longer safe travel destinations. Discouragement when yet another misguided, irresponsible article hits the Canadian papers.


And the dreaded public washroom issue.


Let me reiterate my point here, if it’s not yet clear. These are OUR children, and they’re being treated unfairly.


At this point in the story, you should be angry.

It is our RESPONSIBILITY as parents to raise a generation of caring people, that will (hopefully) be smarter than us. Are we not yet doing this?


These children are our future decision makers, caregivers, and leaders. Why would you want anything less than fairness and equal opportunity for each and every one of them? It’s time for us to step up a bit… show them we’ve got their backs and we’ll fight for them. We’ll fight for their friends too.


And we’ll support their parents by educating ourselves on what being inclusive really means (links below), because most of us really have no idea.

Know better = do better... right?


We’ll have open conversations in our homes, and we won’t believe everything we read without first questioning the source. Eradicating hate, phobias and ignorance starts at home, and we owe it to all children to work on that. Imagine the things they could accomplish in this world if they didn’t have to worry about things like which box to check on their application forms.


Let's do better.

************

L.Doyle

Specializing in environmental/creative portraiture and content creation for small businesses, Lyndsay Doyle Photography is based in the Halifax area of Nova Scotia.


#inclusionmatters #LGBTQ2 #transrights #transyouth #PFLAG #BraveVoices #modernparenting #inclusion #humanrights


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Simply Good Form Consultancy is based near K’jipuktuk (Halifax) in Mi’kma’ki (Nova Scotia), the traditional and unceded territory of the M’ikmaq people. Settlers and the M’ikmaq have lived in this territory under the provisions of the Peace and Friendship Treaties since 1760 and 1772. We are all treaty people in Mi’kma’ki.

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